Lo! and behold; Low names his German squad

With Joachim Low announcing his German squad for Euro 2012 this afternoon, the three favourites for the competition have all now shown their hands to their opponents; not that their hand was much of a secret anyway what with scouting and television coverage and all that.

Anyway, Low has had to cut four players from his provisional squad to make the 23-man limit with the men missing out all having featured in the Germans 5-3 loss to Switzerland at the weekend. Coincidence? No, of course not considering the German squad was missing its nine Bayern Munich players for that game and with the number of substitutes made during friendly matches, a player would feel cursed or wonder why the manager hates him with a fervent passion if he did not make an appearance at St Jakob Park.

The four unlucky men to miss out on everything that a German jaunt to Poland and Ukraine has to offer (this is a joke about the stereotypical dullness of the Germans, not a “the war” joke, please note) are goalkeeper and owner of at least one too many names Marc-Anre ter Stegen (Borussia Monchengladbach), midfielders Sven Bender (Borussia Dortmund) and Julian Draxler (Schalke 04) and striker Cacau (Stuttgart).

Much like the Dutch squad, as well as the probable French and Portuguese squads for that matter, the German outfit look decidedly top heavy and markedly superior offensively than they do defensively despite only calling up three strikers.

Miroslav Klose, Lukas Podolski and Mario Gomez are all proven goalscorers at the highest level and with the likes of Mesut Ozil, Thomas Mu              ller, Marco Reus, Mario Goetze and Bastian Schweinsteiger (albeit in a more defensive role for the national side these days) backing them up, this German side should prove to be a handful for any defence.

 Meanwhile, a defence that can ‘boast’ the likes of Per Mertesacker and Holger Badstuber- but augmented with the excellent Mats Hummels and Phillip Lahm- may have the likes of Robin van Persie, Cristiano Ronaldo and Nicklas Bendtner (ahem) secretly salivating*.

With such attacking talent and defensive vulnerabilities showcased amongst the six favourites for the tournament (England being the notable exception), Euro 2012 might just well be a goal fest. Which has now been jinxed; my apologies.

That German squad in full is;

Goalkeepers: Manuel Neuer (Bayern Munich), Tim Wiese (Werder Bremen), Ron-Robert Zieler (Hannover)

Defenders; Jerome Boateng (Bayern Munich), Holger Badstuber (Bayern Munich), Benedikt Howedes (Schalke), Mats Hummels (Borussia Dortmund), Phillip Lahm (Bayern Munich), Per Mertesacker (Arsenal), Marcel Schmelzer (Borussia Dortmund)

Midfielders; Lars Bender (Bayer Leverkusen), Mario Goetze (Borussia Dortmund), Ilkay Gundogan (Borussia Dortmund), Sami Khedira (Real Madrid), Toni Kroos (Bayern Munich), Thomas Muller (Bayern Munich), Marco Reus (Borussia Monchengladbach), Mesut Ozil (Real Madrid) Andre Schuerrle (Bayer Leverkusen), Bastian Schweinsteiger (Bayern Munich)

Strikers; Mario Gomez (Bayern Munich), Miroslav Klose (Lazio), Lukas Podolski (Cologne)

To sign off, here is an Egyptian Coca-Cola advert for the German national team (wait, it gets weirder) featuring some disturbing looking men in full German kits in a sauna for reasons thankfully beyond my comprehension.

*Germany face Holland, Portugal and Denmark in their group

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