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Fellaini’s Triple Pronged Attack (Video)

Martial arts has been thought beneficial to football before; flexibility in your joints, quicker reflexes, and stronger muscles. Fellaini has all this, so he took it to the next level.

During the Everton game at the Britannia, Fellaini took exception to Ryan Shawcross’s tight marking at set pieces and pulled out some Street Fighter moves.

Certain martial arts rely on particular strikes with particular parts of the body, now I don’t know what they practice in Belgium but I’ve never heard of the Afro, Elbow, Palm technique that Fellaini used.

For the first corner he gives the ref’s vision a check then lets the centre-back taste his ‘fro, there’s a funny moment of realisation dawning across Shawcross’s face as he sees the anger boiling below the hair.

Next up they’re both facing the same way, but that won’t stop Marouane! He goes for a backwards headbutt, only managing a slight face whip with a rouge curl, and follows up with a snide left elbow. For the finale, the Belgian tower decided to try and plant a handprint on his determined (and bruised) marker.

I’ve made light of it here because it was comical refereeing from Mark Halsey. Sure, lots of stuff goes on in the box (especially with Stoke); little shirt pulls and cunning blocking, but these are not subtle fouls.

So giving him the benefit of the doubt, he misses the first one – it’s not acceptable to the viewer, but it happens. But he obviously notes that Shawcross goes down for the whole play. On the next offence something obviously happens that involves Ryan and Marouane because Asmir Begovic comes flying out of the goal screaming himself into the book about fouls.

Now considering this information, don’t you think he’d maybe keep an eye on them on the next set piece, the one with the punch?

Fellaini should see himself pick up ban, maybe a three-match, one for each offence, but I think Halsey should probably sit one out too.