Arsenal vs Stoke, the alternative match report

So the weekend begins with me very poorly and in bed with a fever which by the way lasted 4 days, but no problem the medicine of another fine arsenal performance ahead of me will be the perfect pick me up.

I get some post through the door and its my arsenal season ticket renewal, the new price is £1075,wasen’t sure whether that was good or not but the Stoke game will be my guide, anyway I am lying on the sofa wrapped in a blanket and so kick off begins…same same same pretty pretty pass pass pass no attempts on goal, then the worst thing happens we concede a corner, and Kenyne Jones scores, I always thought he looks like the child that Bob Marley and Whoppi Goldberg would have had, had they hooked up, anyway this goal Jones strolls into the penalty area like he is going to the shops to buy a newspaper and quarter of cola cubes and scores off his belly, now this fella is about 6 6 but didn’t need to do anything apart from having the skill  to be able to walk forward…typical Arsenal.

Then the 2nd goal scored by Pennant who on his day can become a really average player, he must have run 20 yards with every Arsenal player moving out of the way making it easier for him, he then shoots and the only time an Arsenal player gets in the way is when it comes off their arse before loooping over the keeper….Dreadful Arsenal. 

2nd half and he takes off Ramsey and Arshavin and replacing them with Bendtner and Chamakh, 2 non scoring forwards, Van Persie scores again(Arsenals most important player, forget Cesc),then within 60 seconds Djourou plays a delightful pass straight into the path of Walters who scores.

Thank you and good night to the worst Arsenal defence I can remember.

I looked at my season ticket  and realised the price was £10.75, bit expensive at almost 11 quid i thought, but the genius of Wenger 3 shocking defenders from our feeder French league to compliment as I said the worst defence in our history which included Stepanovs,Cygan and Geoff Barnett, worse of all was Wengers interview who when interviewed about our season which promised so much but ended up with nothing, Wenger pointed out that 3rd isn’t nothing(no doubt he thinks 4th also isn’t nothing also), I beg to differ, 3rd and 4th are great open top bus ride celebrations, can’t wait to sing that at the theatre of broken dreams..”we got the 4th best team in the land”………….

Until next time

Wenger out